The Uninvited (The Guard Brothers, 2009)

Region 1 Paramount (USA)
NTSC, 1.85:1 16x9 enhanced
87 minutes
Audio: DD 5.1 English, DD 5.1 French, DD 5.1 Spanish
Subtitles: Optional English SDH, French, Spanish
Extras: Unlocking The Uninvited; deleted scenes; alternate ending

Released: 28 April 2009

It’s easy to blame Hollywood for creative bankruptcy, but creative bankruptcy isn’t exclusive to the United States. In France, Luc Besson is a one-man factory of copycatting, churning out Eurotrash garbage by the metric tonne. In Asia, it seems like every young director not worth his salt is in the business of making “psychological” horror thrillers, but they all share similar cop-outs that un-do any “psychological” dimensions that the movies may’ve attempted to build. What’s “psychological” about telling your viewers, “Oh, you didn’t really see what you saw”? I guess these movies don’t really have cop-outs; they really have “psych-outs”...which are cop-outs anyway.

Never mind.

The Uninvited was “inspired” by another Asian horror thriller, but the title should really be The Uninspired. You get ghosts/zombies that are drained of color and crawl along the floor like human crabs. They make odd sounds like the little boy in the Ju-On (that’s The Grudge to Joe American) movies. The ending explains everything the way that Ethan Hunt’s flashbacks did in the first Mission: Impossible theatrical feature. Great actors like David Strathairn and Elizabeth Banks are totally wasted.

The moral of the story? People all over the world copy the worst crap from each other. Welcome to globalization.

Video:
The 1.85:1 anamorphic widescreen picture is pristine and beautifully moody, though detail takes a huge step down from the Blu-ray’s 1080p resolution. Hues are rich but naturalistic.

Audio:
This disc features a DD 5.1 English mix that is typical of most other “scary” movies. Basically, you get a lot of ambient noises and “creepy” music cues punctuated by loud “GOTCHA!” effects. Dialogue is clear and intelligible, though Mr. Strathairn is sometimes a bit soft-spoken.

Extras:
Upon loading, the disc plays previews for other movies.

“Unlocking The Uninvited” is a superficial overview of the production. Of course, the interviewees all think that they’ve re-invented the wheel.

You also get a few deleted scenes and an alternate ending.